Joyner Lucas

Every now and then a song and a video comes along that makes you see your whole shit in a different light. Joyner Lucas's "Ross Capicchioni" is that video and song. 

I’ve always been one to run with hard knocks. Call me dumb. Call me adventurous. Call me whatever the fuck you want. I don't care. I grew up without a silver spoon. I was by no means poor. We were, at times, broke at best, but I saw my single mom stress, saw her cry, experienced violence and abuse in the home, saw alcohol ruin lives, knew what it was like to go without in a land of plenty. But I’ve never been a REAL hard knock myself. I mean I can handle my own when it comes to a squab, but I’ve never owned or pulled a gun on anyone. I’ve had them pulled on me. Seen young men lose their lives. Part of the shit that just happens. I just chalked it up. I dabbled in minor criminal shit. Shoplifting. Drugs. Vandalism. But never anything with any super real consequences as far as I saw it. 

I had a few moments where I looked around and realized that I needed to change. Move. Get out. Fast. And I did. I am grateful for that clarity. That internal sense. I’ve also been very lucky. 

Joyner Lucas’ tale of the true story of Ross Capicchioni fucked with me. I could have been that dude. Like 1000 times over. Looking for a friendly face. Needing back up. Wanting to be down. 

I also watched on the news last week, the story of a girl visiting her sister in LA from Texas. Her name was Kristine Carman, and she’s dead. Victim of a drug deal gone back, or so it seems. She was in the backseat of a car as her sister’s boyfriend attempted to sell a couple of pounds of weed. And things went bad. She was shot. And is now no longer with us. I’m not reporting on this, the facts may change, but it occurred to me how many times this could have happened to me. How many things to which I’ve been witness. How many times things could have gone wrong. 

I love real fucking people. I love people who are incapable of hiding their bullshit. Who won't censor themselves for the sake of approval from the mainstream. MIddle fingers up. The people that don’t give a fuck what you think. Sometimes, most of the time, these people are a little rough around the edges. Have made questionable life decisions. Often for the worse. Sometimes for the better. Usually for love and passions and the incapability of being a 9-5 drone. They aren’t the most educated. Though not exclusively. They aren’t the wealthiest, though not without exception. But they are real. Through and through and I love and appreciate that more than anything the phoniness of our culture spoons feeds us. 

There have been times were very real danger existed and I just want to take a second to acknowledge that I’m lucky that I’m here. 

After watching Joyner Lucas’ brilliantly rapped summary of Ross Capicchioni’s story, I took stock. I just want to say that I feel fortunate to be here, and I live my life everyday feeling appreciative. I don’t have the most shit. I don’t have money for expensive vacations. I don’t have fancy cars or all the latest kicks. What I do have is a lifetime of experience that I feel fortunate to have had, and that keeps me making the creative passionate choices I make everyday to be exactly who I want to be. 

But it isn’t always that simple. Be careful out there. Watch yourself. Don’t be naive. Keep your eyes open. Watch your back. Protect your neck. All that shit. 

Most of all: Trust the company that you keep.

Thank you to all my family and my family of friends for keeping me safe, keeping me inspired, keeping me laughing and feeling loved. It’s been an adventure. One that I have no plans of stopping, ever. I feel lucky to have all of you.