Avec Sans

A couple years ago I had a pair of Avec Sans tracks on my manpod that would pop up at just the worst fucking times. I would be knuckle deep in pounding out turkey burgers, or just stepped into the shower to wash off the sin, or I'dve just pulled into work; every time was a bad time it seemed.

Wait, you think I was trying to avoid the Avec Sans shits? 

Nah mang. Either my hands were full of raw poultry or I was wet in the shower or I was already at work bro, that means I couldn't turn the shit up and go full tween on myself. WHY YOU ASSUMES I BE THE HATINS?!?!

So then Avec Sans disappears and I'm left to other random bubblegum electro pop and it's all just bad influences on me and shit, so I've started smoking, using the F word (which is fahntahstic with long "a" sounds), wearing dozens of bracelets on each wrist, and what's worse, I've started cutting my bangs again (GASP!).

ENTER "Heartbreak Hi" THE OTHER DAY. 

I don't know what the fuck it is about the vocals on Avec Sans, but I immediately feel like I'm in a teen love montage and the wind's blowing my hair (dem bangs) in slow motion as I look longingly out at the ocean, which out here in the suburbs of Chicago is just a puddle of melted snow filled with plastic grocery bags and strips of plastic wrap from pallets of lawn fertilizer. "Heartbreak Hi" has all of the retro pop feels one could possibly fit into three fucking minutes, but unlike some of the others, this shit feels so fucking genuine.

I love how I know it's plasticy, but the plastic feels like rigid silicone, and it doesn't offgas, and it's suitable for harness play, and it's made in fucking America or some shit.

Here, I'll sum it up: Avec Sans' "Heartbreak Hi" is the strapon we all needed today. I mean, how else can you make Super Tuesday involve dildos? I fucking love this shit.