Videos

I love getting introduced to new artists, especially when the shit is seriously dope. Superior (who is a Germany-based producer) dropped a lush, gorgeous ass video in my crotch region. My Whole World saunters in, calm and confident, and gently squeezes your lemons until it gets the juice it’s looking for from you. I must admit, I’m drained. Aside from being inspired by the luminaries of hip-hop (Public Enemy, DJ Premier, Wu-Tang), he’s got massive fingers, with the girth and force of a giant, and those gargantuan meat hooks crafted a really nice song here. From his soon to be released LP Scenes. Pour me another, you German bastard.

Sammy Warm Hands is one of my favorite rappers you've never heard of. He's another emcee who can rap his dick off and gets not an ounce of the recognition he deserves. I picture his water cooler raps, you know when the coworkers press you to bust because they heard from your other coworker you accidentally saw at the bar that you rap, making said coworkers' ties fly back in a breeze birthed from the sheer power of his true word. This new track, Endless Excuses is just one in a long line of hilariously weird rap classics that Sammy Warm Hands is rubbing out! I swear there'll be a place in the old hard drive for all things Sammy Warm Hands from '14 til infinity, bitches! The third verse by K.I. Design (of The Architex) had me dead. Let's just say that I explicitly identify with the...

Human Behavior is an anomalous folk group with a little dark cloud following them around. I shared their video, Chapter 1 with a few people. And I got two reactions. 1. Hate 2. Love I very much fall into the latter category. This quirky song and even quirkier video touched me somewhere moist and potential hairy. POW! Right in the feels! Apparently, Zach Zdziebko, Adult Swim producer and man with the most impossible to spell last name in the history of all last names, agrees. Since, you know, he directed the video and all. So now I'm sharing it with you! Are you a #1 or a #2? Human Behavior’s first studio album is called, Bethphage. It's available for preorder over at Folktale Records.

Mike Arson came to my attention from the homie Masai. And bro, I'm a Masai fan boy. I have Masai jorts, a Masai tankini and a shitload of Masai beverage coasters around the crib bro. I even reference my genitals as if Masai himself had circumcised me. Seeing as I have a hidden camera in the ATG mansion out in New York (pronounced New YOK bro), I sort of swindled my way into getting the world premiere of the new Mike Arson video titled Rooftops, which features my favorite human with a brain and a mic, Masai. If you've never spent time with the boys in ATG, I think this is a fucking delcious place to start. You've got the subtle bounce and drive beat bangin', but it's the feeling of "I already know this track" that sets me off when it comes to most of the ATG tracks I put in the...

I love it when I'm on the toilet and a video link pops up from an email address I don't recognize and I'm all "well who knew I had seven minutes to burn?". So I clicks the links and I let the video load and I start half-watching/half-yawning. Until I'm not. (The following is an accurate reenactment of my toilet experience.) THIS LADY IS OBVS A DOORMAT. HOLY HELL HER FAMILY SUCKS! SHE FINNA SNAP! OH HELL BALLS SHE SNAAAAAAAAAAPS! Why am I cheering on a music video? How does one achieve an erection while defecating? How did it all come to this? WHY AM I MAKING THE SCRUNCHY FACE? WHY DO I WANT TO RUN IN SLOW MOTION TO THE CORNER STORE AND BUY A GANG OF fucking FUNYUNS? Jesus balls the beat on this song is making me want to break fax machines, like, all fucking over the place. What started...

Bromies, what do you get when you combine three of my absolute favorite things: Roy Orbinson-esque rock, dudes in dresses, and infomercials? Beside very handsome women dreamily Slap Chopping my man onions in VERY dark sunglasses, you get Shivery Shakes new video for their wistfully rock and roll song, Hold On from the album Three Waves and a Shake.

Who the hell is Mating Ritual? shit sounds like a smarmy and stoned Scissor Sisters, and that's the best fucking compliment I can throw at it. It's huge, while not acting huge. It's like this song is wearing a Members Only jacket, but no one knows it's a Members Only jacket because the logo is the same color as the jacket. WHAT A MINDFuck YEA? After hearing Toxins the first time, I went and listened to it six more times. Now I'm doing the running man in slow motion while people throw room temperature pasta at my bare and hairy chest. I fucking adore this track. Let's all go stalk this asshole until he drops his upcoming EP titled Suck It, Nerds.

Cas One is the bro of all bros. What does that mean to the everyman? IT MEANS HE WEARS KHAKIS TO WORK, HATES SMOKE DETECTORS, ONCE STOLE A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER FROM A FANCY RESTAURANT JUST TO BRING BACK TO HIS MOTEL ON TOUR, and he loves his wife. "October" is the fucking JAM of all JAMS (and other assorted canned fruits) from the syffal-lauded album The Monster and the Wishing Well, so when I forced Cas One to give SYFFAL the premiere, what else could the bro do besides give the premiere to SYFFAL? WELL, HE COULD'VE GONE TO COLLEGE AND GOT A REAL JOB, SURE. BUT SCREW THAT BROS. Peep the interview Cas did with us while this video was being formatted: INTERVIEW HERE.

AH DAMN. I LOVE THIS. WHY DOES THIS RUIN MY DAY WHEN IT SHOULD BE MAKING MY DAY? I'll tell you why you fucking assmunching assmuncher. Holy Holy, and their deliciously melodic traipse through my subconscious in the track History, feels like an awesome fucking smooshfest of some of my favorite bands of the last ten years. I can't just enjoy the piss out of the song. I have to pinpoint the exact second this song feels like another band I love for EACH band they touch (mmmhmmmm, touch). Should I list all of them here? EAT MY ASS BRO. If you can't pick up on some of the sounds these sounds sound like, you shouldn't even BE here bro. But I think maybe my issue with this band Holy Holy is that I want their music to play while I do everything, so I can understand what life would be like...

Hey, fuckers, lovers, friends and enemies, you ever hear of a rapper goes by the name of Sarx? You neither? Well, let me fucking introduce you to this fucking beautiful sasquatch of a rapper. Sarx is from the Northwest and, along with Graves33, is part of collab crew, WINGS AND WOUNDS. He is as good of a person as he is bad of a rapper. And you know I mean not bad meaning bad, but bad meaning SENSH-YOU-ALL! Graves33 so graciously allowed us to premiere the, Death of the Pep Rally video featuring none other than Syffal fave, Ceschi. Death of the Pep Rally is the first released track off Graves and Sarx's new project, WINGS AND WOUNDS, and color me touched. Not only is the video shot in that ferngully-esque muted tone that only the Pacific Northwest can muster with it's...