Videos

How did the director of Sadistik and Kno's video, "To Be in Love," bring my spank bank to life? GOOD GOD, Y'ALL! I'm flying to Portland to sleep on Mike Golden's couch and go to shows and pretend I live far away from where I actually do. Los Angeles has that affect sometimes.  "Even lovers need a little time away… from each ooooooootherrrrr." I'm looking forward to public transportation that takes me place I actually want to go, seemingly more food trucks than actual restaurants, chicks who dig husky bearded white guys who rap, and knitted scarves on public statues.  Also while in that fantastic Ewok Village of a city, I'm going to see Ceschi and Sadistik, or for most people I should say Sadistik and Ceschi. It's one in a long line of what are rapidly becoming classic Niklas Oliver...

I hit play and then clicked away and it wasn't until just before the two minute mark when I realized I wasn't paying attention to anything anymore. Sophomore takes a spaced out chill and then gently increases the depth of the nod, and just when you're completely slow-seizing, he backs off the gas again, then when it reemerges you're too comfortably in the pocket to not notice how delightful the radiating synth in the background is. This beat is so fucking badass it feels like good memories and shit.  It's Boards of Canada but it almost feels like I can appreciate it with another sense besides just through hearing. "Duck and Cover", I can touch. BALLS.

Who the fuck is Mãs? This guitar work is my favorite thing about today. Crisply loose and sexy, I've listened to this song over a dozen times just focusing on the guitar's balls danglin' and I'm lick-smitten. "Higher Spirit" sounds like a Jamiroquoi-Timberlake, but without all the faces you want to punch for wearing hats too large for just one little Kiwi man. I haven't felt something this sexy in my side face holes in weeks. Holy hell it's going to be dickficult to walk around in surgical scrubs sporting wood crafted from pine chopped down in the forest of Mãs, but I'll press on, just tucked and safe up against the belly bro.  OBSESS NOW, IT'S A GOOD TIME.

MECHANICAL LEGS MECHANICAL LEGS.  Once my daughter just randomly said this from the backseat and I was like I'M SEEING ROBOTS.  And she was all WALKING BY EVERYDAY.  As a sort of test at this point I decided to really crank the cogs and came with HALFSHARKALLIGATOR HALF and before I could finish she piped up with an indignant MAN! Me: ROCKETS ON THE BATTLEFIELD!  Her: MICHAEL JORDAN I'M AFFORDIN' HIM.  Me: GIRL DON'T LIKE HER JOB… Her: I HIRE AND FIRE, GIVE YOU CHECKS WHEN IT'S HOT! Finally I responded with wonder, FRONTING WITH YOUR CELLULAR PHONE THAT DOESN'T WORK.  WHY!? she demanded. THE STRUCTURE OF COMBAT IS LIKE WRESTLEMANIA CONTRACTS!  That's when we both agreed with Kool Keith, I'M FREAL WITH THIS!  Plus L'Orange's jazz beat is fucking fuh-yre! 

WHAT THE FUCK IS JOEL DOING? JOEL IS SITTING ON A BENCH LISTENING TO THIS FUCKING SONG OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND HE'A TAPPINS ON HE'S LAP BRO. TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP T'TAP TAP - And thens I stands and I twirls and I shrug my shoulders up to me ears and sing "Now I'm runnin' around like a jar without a lid" and then resit and retap the lap.  Dylan Seeger, this track "Weird" is fucking dope. Why this video has been out a year and only has like 400 likes is an affront on all that is cheese filled and post-it note sized. I mean, I guess the video's kind of sketchy, but isn't that like, the intent bro? GET THIS MORE VIEWS BY SHOWING YOUR MOM. 

I hit play on this video and then went about my business of doing ALL THE BUSINESS. About forty five minutes later I was over by the printer reamalgamating the rigamarole with some good ol' fashioned bipartisanship and I started singing the fucking chorus. EAT SHIT AARON KRAUSE. I SURE AS HELL WANNA LOSE THIS FUCKING EAR WORM THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Talk about chill balls, Aaron Krause drops some Sigur Ros meets Sevonica-like electro pop with "Don't Wanna Lose You". And BROS, I'm all rubbings my chests, tiltings my heads back, and swayings sides to sides as I melt into the afternoons. While I don't normally admit I'm into shit this gentle, I think this is extremely well produced both visually and sonically, and I love the fact that there isn't a snare snap anywhere.  If the rest of...

I fucking love this shit. That swanky ball thwapping picking hand has me by the fucking short and curlies bro. Daaaaaamn this shit is noddy. Whenever you come across a beat that's just made for listening to on repeat, regardless of how dope the video is (and this video melts into the dopez bro), you gotta share the shit. Check out this dude Sorbmal, which stands for "man with many guitar layers", and realize that ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.  I love finding music that makes me want to make music. Sorbmal is fucking brillballs for this. "Dogma" sounds exactly like a Saturday night where you get home early, shut the door, and just start creating. I just wish I had talent like this asshole.  Damn this is smooth balls. 

It doesn't matter what visuals you put in front of this song, it's fuckin rawk.  Although I will wholeheartedly agree with the inclusion of some fuckin' Zubaz pants, I find the video trying too hard to be as awesome as the song. BUT WAIT, o boy just danced on a frilly laced ass of a 60s chick before licking his mustache, now I'm on board. If you aren't already on the Dirty Ghosts bandwagon, get the fuck up here and enjoy wearing well worn black denim and cut off rock and roll tshirts. I LOVE THIS BAND. 

There is something about Oddisee that makes him more than a rapper to me. Maybe because he's also one of the most gifted producers in the multiverse. But damn, I don't know which I love more. It's like sitting at the table and there's gumbo AND sushi!? HOW DO YOU CHOOSE?  The thing is you don't have to. Take that yellow yail and drown it in that roux, bruh! C'est bon!  With Oddissee you get both worlds. You literally have your cake and get to PLAY IT LOUD ON SUNDAY MORNING WHILE YOU MAKE CINNAMON TOAST FOR YOUR KIDS.  There're layers and layers and layers to unpack: the disconnect, the belonging, the personal, the universal, the jazz, the knocks, STRAWBERRY FILLING!  Plus this video was shot right here in my home-alopolis of Los fucking Angeles. Come visit me. No really.  You can download...

Maaaaaan, fuck these guys.  THREE YEARS AGO, I begged these assholes for a Pop Cultures Collide version of the Gummi Bears themesong, THEN THEY GIVE VICE A PREMIERE OF THEIR NEW CANDY THEMED MASTERPIECE? I don't know whether to be turned on, offended, or re-enter the seminary sans seminal vesicles. Either way, their new album came out yesterday or today or when the fuck ever, and I've already downloaded it, and there's a boy on the cover that my wife would TOTALLY tussle.  JUST LOOK, HIS HAIR IS TOTALLY TUSSLEABLE!!!!