Videos

So, drums. Right? So happy there are no words, because, srrriously, there are no words. HOLY FUCKING DRUMS YUSSEF KAMAAL.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY. How do people like the guy behind Nyle Quit The Band exist alongside the rest of us miserable assholes? The only reason I opened this is because of the Tenacious D lyric: "Last week, Kyle quit the band. DOESN'T MATTER. Now we're back together again." which makes me happy, because Tenacious D. So there I am, sitting upright in bed, waiting for my wife to return so we can finish David Blaine swallowing a sword (pronounced SW-ORD) and then get down to all the sex, and I click on the email. Remember, I have 5,856 unread music submissions and I can't get through them fast enough. But I clicked. And I opened the video. And pretty soon all three of my kids and my wife are circled around my open phone, now in landscape mode, and we're all smiling down at...

While I refuse to type that motherfucker's name into my website, I've been just as fucked up over November 8th, 2016 as anyone else with a quarter ounce of empathy and respect for fellow humans, regardless of skin color or favorite style of cheeto.  Solvents sent this over yesterday and it's spot the fuck on. Peep the lyrics for "I'm Gonna Fight", and then remember to look up from your phone long enough to stand the fuck up for the people who might be getting stepped on in front of you for the next four years or more. BE BETTER. Lyrics: How on Gods green earth.. Did we ever end up here? Backed into this corner in the dark surrounded by this bigotry, this hate, this fear… Now I’ve got friends these days that are afraid/to walk the streets alone and be ok   And I...

I want to live within the confines of Dan San's existence. I've decided that's where I want to be. Everything feels so pastel and whimsical and with all of the excess whimsy we produce from being so pastel, we sell that back to the whimsy company and get rebates on our whimsy bills.  Dan San is the patience I wish my children had. "Dream" is the way I'd like to wake up for the next fifty years: calm, happy, the aforementioned pastel and whimsy, shit, Dan San just makes me want to stretch my arms over my head and hug a stranger. DAN SAN IS WHAT I NEEDED TODAY. PADDLE BOATS AHOY!

It's no secret that SYFFAL is a direct descendant of Atoms Family. I started SYFFAL with Alaska and have remained better than best friends with the dude since 2005. When people ask how you can be so close with someone who lives so far away, my answer is usually "there's no way we can let each other down because the expectations are so broad".  In saying so, I have essentially described my relationship with everything Atoms over the last few years. Because of the fact that the Family is so vast (heh) and includes so many personalities, you never know what you're going to get, but there's little room to be disappointed because the level of talent contained within the fleshy vibrating walls of Atoms Family.  Cryptic One and Alaska have teamed up on "M.A.B.A." on a futuristic delve...

Why am I in love with this? Maybe it's the innocence on this woman's face, paired with the vivid fucking words she's singing so calmly, describing things I'm not sure I should even be imagining. Sälen is killing me. I'm so confused.  But regardless of how erotically she's charged me, the rhythm on this shit is fucking dope and I'm loving how it sounds like something Liz Phair would sing, but couldn't pull off like Sälen does here. "Copper Kiss" is fucking butter. 

Kendra Morris kills me.  Her delivery is so perfect, it's almost artificially flavored. But then it isn't, it isn't contrived, forced, fake, or plastic, it's as authentic as the pain in my sinuses from physically crying in front of my children for reasons that are obvious, but deserve no mention here on November 9th, 2016.  "Woman" is gut wrenching, powerful, and the exact distraction I've come to rely on since 3am this morning.  Kendra, you are fucking amazing, and I love everything you create. Please create more so I can continue to obsess over the shit. I'd much rather obsess over this beauty than everything fucking else in my ear. 

It's just a game. We know bro. Thanks for reminding me. But it kinda ain't... People who didn't grow up a loser might not get it. People who didn't grow up with uncles with shitty Ditka mustaches wearing Zubaz pants and Starter jackets with cousins named Jordan and Grant and Payton and Clark and Addison and Sammy might not get it. I never thought I'd see my shitty baseball team from Chicago not be shitty. I never thought I'd wear this jersey outside of my house expecting my Sox fan friends to not fuck with me. I can't fucking believe "Someday" is fucking November fucking 2nd, fucking 2016.  I used to play this game in slow motion in my dreams.  I used to play this game in my backyard with the wiffle ball bat, by myself, because my neighbors were Sox fans. I used to watch games on WGN as a...

What the fuuuuuuudge!?  Fuh realz! I LOVE being alive in these days... AH, these refreshing days. Like cold champagne straight from the bottle while dancing on the graves of the careers of Mel Gibson and Paula Deen.  While middle America clutches its wrankled nuts and clinches its hemoroid-ridden and Arby's stained anuses, I, my friends, am breathing easy. Why this sense of calm amidst the frenzy of the present? Why this serenity while America becomes a moshpit at an All American Rejects concert (sponsored by Old Navy)?  Because Uncle fucking Meg is on the case. Who is Uncle Meg, you say?  I asked that very same shits, y'all!  Uncle Meg is a hip hop artist from Brooklyn, NYC, who is also genderqueer, and I'll be damned if Uncle Meg ain't got a hard ass doom rap video full of maggots and...

I'm still a pussy for this song. My kids and I spent the better part of two days in September discussing why daddy was crying every time he heard this song. Then we had to talk about why I kept starting it over. Then we talked about "getting high" and what that meant, and while at first I danced around it, I think I came up with the perfect description for "getting high". Check it. "Getting high" is the act, whether literal and physical or figuratively and emotionally, of intentionally losing focus on the things that bring you discomfort. While some choose the physical act of taking something to mentally separate themselves from pain, "getting high" can also mean putting on a song you love and letting it take up your entire focus instead of worry and fear and all the other things we try...